Where Were These Teachers When I Was in School???

Seriously…I’m not surprised at this. That is, after all, what happens when our society gives sex offenders a pat on the butt. When it’s a pretty gal screwing a hormone-charged guy, we give it a pass. If the teacher were a guy, we’d be rightly waxing poetic about what a pervert he is. Stephanie Ragusa, however, may be going the way of Mary Kay LeTourneau after this.

Da Rocket Boosted More than His Pitching Performance?

Prior to the Mitchell Report, Roger Clemens had a squeaky-clean reputation as a hard-working, clean-cut baseball player. While many players hated his combative style–which included lots of brushback pitches, he was looked at as a positive role model. Even Jose Canseco once remarked that Clemens was the only player he knew who never cheated on his wife.

Well, if the latest reports are true, he can kiss that legacy goodbye.

A Job of International Goodwill for Pilgrim and Me

Joel F., a man identified by Austrian authorities, has confessed to imprisoning his daughter for 24 years, subjecting her to incest, fathering at least 7 children with her.

Pilgrim and myself are ready to do the world a great favor and remove this clod from the gene pool.

However, it is imperative that we commence immediately our long-awaited engineering study of monotonous, cyclical blunt-force trauma and its effects on child predators over the course of days. That would be included in our gravitational tests, which we aim to conduct in the most scenic mountainous areas of eastern Kentucky.

Bummer, but I understand

At about the same time that I started chasing Christina, a couple guys in her locale also started expressing interest in her. She mentioned that at the outset.

During this time, one of them started getting bold in pursuit. This left her with two choices: (a) give the first opportunity to the guy who is in her proverbial backyard, or (b) wait another month and a half before she gets to see a 41-year-old who lives a thousand miles away.

She chose (a).

Can’t say I blame her, but–if that doesn’t work out–she knows where to find Amir Larijani. ūüėČ

Product Review: Precor EFX-576i Elliptical Jogger

The elliptical joggers at my gym are aging–some are falling apart. Yesterday, the owners provided two new joggers: Precor EFX-576i. Given that I am the unofficial king of the elliptical at the gym, the owner insisted that I evaluate them.

The first thing I noticed was the comfortable feel of the steps. The motion was also very fluid. Unlike the other joggers, the EFX-576i allows for adjustment of both the resistance level and the incline. This makes it possible to get a good workout of the gluteals as well as the quads and thighs. It also offers a variety of workouts, from a manual setting to various fitness routines. The heart rate monitor allows you to peg your workout pace to your target heart rate. 

But the true test is extended use: I had to go for at least an hour, so I set the resistance level to something that provided the calorie burn rate of the other joggers. The result was one heck of a killer cardio workout. After 60 minutes, I was sweating as much as I would after 90 minutes on the other joggers. On the other hand, my joints felt great. No problems with my back, knees, elbows, or neck. The joint comfort was outstanding.

There were two drawbacks, however:

  1. The handles are fat. That is a problem if you have small hands. However, that is also a potential advantage: by gripping the handles with your thumbs against your index fingers, that is more ergonomically sound as it helps prevent potential carpal-tunnel problems.
  2. The bottle holder is directly under the handles. That creates some problems when you want to grab your bottle for a drink in the middle of the jog.

Those, however, are very petty issues. Overall, it is a great workout, offering challenge to both the gym rats like me and those who wish to get in shape. In fact, if I had $4,000, I’d buy one myself. LOL