My Desire To Have A Remote Control For My Life

I don’t have a T.V. . When I moved last year, I decided I would not spend money to buy a T.V. . I knew that I would use it as a distraction and to be irresponsible.

One of the aspects of T.V. that it makes it so “user friendly” is that they often come with a remote control. You can sit on your couch, change the channel, turn the volume up or down, and do everything you can to get your senses tickled all while never having to get up from your comfort spot.

I want a remote control for my life. I want to skip through the painful or boring parts. Or at least turn the volume down so I can close my eyes until it’s over. The really great parts, I want to press rewind and play them over again. The truly beautiful parts, I just want to press pause and stare.

One of the downsides of the remote control/T.V. is that you don’t have to feel much of anything.

The regulars on this blog have had their share of pain and despair.

We serve and worship a God who is the God of seasons and healing. Some of us are being brought out of a season of pain and apathy. We are being allowed to enter a season of happiness and healing that we never really believed would happen.

Some of us are still in a season of pain and apathy.

To those who are still there, I pose a question that my pastor poses often to our congregation “If your circumstances never change and all you get at the end of life is Jesus, is that enough for you?”

This question was asked regularly in worship during what was a very painful season in my life. I knew Jesus had to be enough or I was doomed. I can’t ask for Jesus plus anything.

I can’t ever put Amir above Jesus.

We are being put together because we are going to be better with one another than we are apart. I have to remind myself a hundred times a day that God is doing something good. There are at least a hundred opportunities a day that I have to let my fears and anxieties rule over me.

I look at my ring and I am reminded that God is in charge. My ring – our ring – does get more beautiful and precious every day. I don’t know how that’s possible. I’ve been wearing it ’round the clock for nearly two weeks.

I get bored very easily. I some times change outfits three or four times a day because I need the change. This ring is not getting old to me.

That’s a miracle. I’m not into jewelry. I can’t tell the difference (by looking) between cubic ziconia and a diamond. I like wearing earings and necklaces, but before getting engaged I was mentally preparing myself to be annoyed with having to wear a ring all the time. I totally thought that wearing a ring would get old very quickly and that I would only continue to wear it out of a sense of obligation and tradition.

Let me tell ya, I love wearing this ring. Amir had to work more than a couple of days for this ring. He took the ring buying process very seriously. If anyone were to try to take it from me, they would get a serious whoopin’.

When Amir & I were talking on the phone last night, I was sitting on my porch. It was dark and the ring was shining brightly in the darkness. I was astonished that I could see it so clearly when it was as dark as it was. There’s a good metaphor for life, for sure.

My fiancรจ is great.

Maybe we should go to Iowa after all . . . ๐Ÿ˜‰

Tying this all together: There are some unique circumstances of the relationship between Amir & I. Dealing with those circumstances is a continual battle for me. It gets easier every day, but certain days are harder than others. I’d like fast forward through the hard days and hit pause on the easier moments/days.

14 thoughts on “My Desire To Have A Remote Control For My Life

  1. ๐Ÿ™‚

    life is like that. not sure that it gets much easier … especially when you have kids. wanting to hold onto the good times …

    which is part of why God told us to remember … to tell the stories … the gift of memory is powerful ๐Ÿ™‚

    btw – great job, Amir … i could see that thing sparkling all the way down here in texas!

  2. Future Mrs. L (And Mr. L for that matter),

    Um, I hate to be pushy, but are we going to get some more details???? Huh, are we? Please? Did you provide some and I missed it??? This spinster would appreciate the witness! ๐Ÿ˜‰

  3. “Maybe we should go to Iowa after all . . . ”

    There is now a 75% chance the good Rev. will be dwelling in KY for the next several months. I guess I could just perform a house call. :>)

  4. i’m not a tv person. my girls watch the food network and hgtv and some tlc and some pbskids, or they watch a dvd. it’s calming for my youngest sometimes … a good thing. i grew up without a tv and played bridge and pinoccle and board games instead. kudos to you for choosing what to allow into your mind and what to leave out.

  5. I have been blessed by Amir as an e-friend for over a year. I really enjoy reading Futuremrslariijani’s posts. I think that she made a good point about her and Amir being put together to glorify God. I decided that I am going to take the energy I could spend consumed by a career and focus on my relational skills so I can come into a Christian marriage.I know that I am walking by faith bc I may never marry, but I know that I am blessed when I submit to the Holy Spirit and ignore worldly cynicism. Have a good weekend!

  6. @Emily
    Emily, how have you been?????
    Interestingly, I have decided to get more serious about a career in preparation for not finding someone–even though I would very much like to be married. I can’t wager that I will definitely marry. But even if I do, I will most likely still have to work.

  7. Hello Savvy –
    I am at work. We are slowing down a little this season because many students have to pick up more work hours this summer and classes have finished early. I have been tired because I have been working over 40+ hours in order to stuff my money like a chipmunk in case I may have to reduce my work hours. I haven’t had a lot of time to do a lot of the things I want to do, like exercise more frequently or join a summer sports league or visit my parents and brother and canine, but I am grateful. I think that I will probably explain myself better in my own blog about my career thoughts, etc. I don’t want to hog up the space in
    this blog with my own thoughts. @Savvy

  8. Emily is Chitownie (Chicago + Townie) in order to promote the blog she will be resurrecting. Sorry to hog so much cyberspace, but I don’t want to confuse or mislead anybody.

  9. Okay, I am sorry again, I am going to be Chitownie, but my blog I am resurrecting is http://www.exchurchmouse.wordpress.com. Don’t get too excited folks, it is just beginning to resurrect. In case anybody is curious, I am Chitownie because I am a Townie (I live 40 minutes from my hometown and don’t want to leave) and despite the cantankerous mutterings and my grumpy moments in traffic, I really love Chicago. Okay, gotta get back to work!

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