I have a friend who has lived the really hard life as a wife, standing by her husband through horrible times when 99.9% of wives would have bailed out. The road to ‘healing’ is slow and fraught with difficulty, but she’s staying the course. I have been vividly honest with her about the realities of divorce. I have encouraged her in her journey while also protecting her. I don’t want to see another couple go through divorce, but I especially don’t want to watch another innocent little boy go through his parents’ divorce.

She and her husband are in an amazing and truly miraculous place right now. Knowing there is always more to life than what we share, I sent her these words yesterday to encourage her:

i know it’s not all roses without thorns … and sometimes it’s probably more the promise of roses not yet budded with thorns … but being divorced would be mostly thorns and a few dead roses. you’re making the best choices. unless he becomes abusive, being married is the best choice. i know being married is a continuous sacrifice, a continuous laying-down-your-life … but being divorced is a continuous death that never ends. my husband and i would trade everything if we could have our first marriages back, but those choices were not ours to make. keep in the fight … stay the course … don’t give up. ‘hard’ is a given … how and where you live ‘hard’ is your choice.