TFR, writing to Dr. Helen, notes the following:
I work for a small software company in Austin, Texas. I am 58. We have a young intern, perhaps 25, from Germany. I was introduced to her once two weeks ago, but we have not worked together and so I have not really spoken with her since.
This morning we happened to be on the elevator together as we arrived at work. When arrived at our floor, I pushed the button to hold the elevator doors open as she walked out. She walked to the card reader that unlocks the entrance and swiped her card. I opened the door when I heard it unlock and held it for her as she stepped through. She actually laughed at me. And not in a good way. I had plenty to do and she is the darling of the CEO who is a woman, so I just got some coffee, went to my desk, and started my work. Elsewhere, I would have said something.
The funny thing is that because of incidents similar to this and worse, I’ve sworn off opening doors for unencumbered, able-bodied women that I don’t know. (I open doors for encumbered or infirm people regardless of gender or acquaintance or if it just makes physical sense.) In this case, I opened her door a) because she is a co-worker, and b) because she went to the card reader first and it would have been rude to just stand there.
On one hand, I want to ask all members of the XX crowd to get together and jot a note or two to tell the XY crowd how these things should work. Really, it can’t be that hard…..
Once, I had a gal who tried that feminist line of crap when I held the door for her. I told her to save her lecture for someone who gives a crap.
The only way to defeat feminism is to stop tolerating it.