Anyone Surprised at This?

I was reading this article at Fox News, regarding monogamy and infidelity. I must admit, in spite of my own cynicism, that I found the infidelity rates surprising at first glance.

OTOH, there are some caveats:

(1) Only 56% of the couples surveyed were married. Are we really sure that this is a good benchmark against which to measure infidelity?

(2) Still, I did find the following statement somewhat surprising:

In fact, married survey participants had significantly more negative attitudes toward monogamy than participants who were seriously dating one person. Is a growing disenchantment with monogamy inevitable?

It would be interesting to see how conservative evangelicals would respond to this. While–at just south of three years of marriage–my attitude would be quite positive, I’ll admit: I’m a newbie.

At the same time, the Biblical view of marriage has shaped my whole approach to it, as well as MrsLarijani’s. While married life has hardly been a cakewalk, I can honestly say it’s been pretty darn good. I’ve enjoyed it more than single life, and not simply on account of the marriage bed (although I have no complaints about that!)

But if I were a single and reading that article, it would not be particularly encouraging. If I’m single–and see that kind of rampant infidelity and general disenchantment toward marriage and monogamy–then why get married?

On balance, this is marginal incentive for singles not to marry.

5 thoughts on “Anyone Surprised at This?

  1. You know what? I think this is one of those time where you have draw the line between the sacred and secular. There is divine warning here, but if the Christian reads this article they should heed the divine warning and realize that they need to be sober minded about their decisions.

    The Christian should not allow the secular media and poorly done surveys guide their decisions.

    Marriage is good. God said so. He is faithful to complete the good work He started. We ought to live in thankfulness to the grace given us.

    If the single person doesn’t want to marry because of some stinkin’ survey, that’s ungodly fear. I can’t even call that prudence.

    • the problem, however, arises when the results of a stinkin’ survey are congruent with what one observes in his or her church circles.

      it may not be the reality in general, but with sufficient particular cases it can adversely impact the margins.

  2. What’s strange is how positive the views are toward monogamy, but yet half don’t seem to follow it. It’s like, “My partner is faithful, but I’m not” type of attitude.

  3. The secular world (and I’ll give you much of the Christian world) doesn’t practice true monogamy. They define monogamy with being with one person at a time, but isn’t it about being with one person for life? There are wild animals more monogamous than we are… and quite frankly, that’s a bit pathetic.

    When we fail to keep our pants on before marriage, we are likely to not have a positive view of marriage. That ache to move on to the next meal is overwhelming and makes sticking with the same partner ad nauseum tedious and unbearable.

    You and Mrs L have the upper hand on this. Both of you being virgins upon marriage, you’re not going to go stir crazy sticking with eachother long term. You actually would probably both have more problems with walking away from each other than staying with eachother.

    And that is the REAL warning to our churches. Keep encouraging abstinence and tell the secularites to suck it.

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